Hey Gurl Hey: Legit Camp Nowhere, 100th Post!

I'm not invisible, I'm making a cumback, dammit!  Shut up, loser.

     Hey Gurls hey, fist (tee hee) of all if the headline above didn't spell it out, this be my 100th post, can't believe we've made it this far.  So please-to do your part to spread the Shamblettes word like legs as, like weens in duh strip club or crabs on your cooch, I'm trynna grow this blog as much as I can as time goes on.  So tweet, poke, retweet, facebook, whatever you need to do to get my words of nom out to the fat assed masses preez.  I'll luz you bacon cheeseburger style if you do.
     NTwayz, pleasantries and cel-ho-brations aside, it's that time again to dig deep in the nethers of time to see what became of "heartthrobs" past.  The 90's are back in the habit like Sister Act 2 these days, so let's take a stroll down memree lane to see what this mop topped douchelord from numerous Tigerbeat photo-spreads is up to today.  You're just a click away from discovering his identity, but don't say I didn't warn you, this guy has spent too many years lodging up extended-stay style in irrelevant-invisible-man fashion at "Camp Nowhere"...

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HEY GURL HEY.....  ANDREW KEEGAN

Michael Jaxon called, he wants his pedo-files back.

     Talk about "bitch where'd you go?"  Keegs is more missing than ratings for anything on Oxygen or Michael Jackson's black skin (too soon times two?).  The last thing I think I remember him in was 10 Things I Hate About You, and I didn't even see that shitshow of a movie but could name 10 things I hated about that movie just based on Julia Styles and Andy K alone.  Bitch is so invisible he's giving Kevin Bacon's Invisible Man jealousy pox... case in point, Independence Day was my jam back in the day and had I not checked IMDB for this post, I'd have no idea home-slice was even in it.  True he played the minor role of "Older Boy", but 1996 was around the peak of his pre-teen pube juice fame and he still disappeared under my gaydar. 

     In perfect title/allegedly news, Rew-Keeg is in a movie called The Unknown Son next year, and he's rumored to be in the 2012 film Manson Rising... but rumor has it I DIDN'T eat 45 Baconators last night for dinner too but we both know that shit ain't true so I'll believe it when none of us see it.  In fact, give or a take a few shitty short films and dick-turd-flops I've never heard of, homeboi hasn't had a semi-legit role since he did 24 episodes of 7th Heaven from 2001-2004, but even that claim to fame is questionable in not-lameness.

Preez, no photos y'all.  Ok.  Who are you again?

     Keegs is on the questionable sexuality list with JTT, and he suffered from that "I'm not just a cute teenybopper" shit all those goofwad kid actors face when he took a gay role in The Broken Hearts Club and then did a play about having the AIDS.  A quick scan of his trivia page on IMDB reveals this little shambled treasure: "Keegan, recently, jumped into the cockpit as "Strayger", a drug smuggling pilot in the high-octane action film, "Kill Speed." Innovative technology allowed the adrenaline-driven actor to perform his own aeronautical stunts in the actual planes."  Now while you take in that "brilliance", let's end our misery and move on before our eyes get stuck in a perminant "rolling into the back of our heads" position. 

     To be honest, this guy (NOW 31! FML I'm old Shambles) never did it for me.  The whole wolfman-mullet look didn't get my jellies jammin' back in the 90's, just like his whole "Osama Bin Laden" (too soon?)/70's gay porn star/Patrick Dempsey/I wish I was James Franco look he's rockin' these days (pictured above) isn't really workin' the nethers either.  All in all, Kegel, I mean Keegan is as useless as ever these days, so here's to hoping the 18 of you that follow this blog and are pretending to read this give him some much needed love and trending out there on the internets... cuz if you don't, I'm sure he'll stay just as buried and hidden as those chicken bones under my bed.